One Take Terror: There Was Nothing There


When I lived in Pittsburgh, I was part of a group called the Rascals, Rogues and Rapscallions. It was a men’s club (not that kind of men’s club) that convened to hear presentations on a variety of arcane topics, after which songs were sung and cigars were smoked. Our summer meetings always centered on a “mass challenge.” Instead of one person presenting in depth, everyone was given the challenge to find “that interesting thing” about XYZ, and give a 5 minute presentation on what they found.

One year, we were given random coordinates on a map and given instructions to bring back a story. I was given coordinates that landed me in the middle of a state forest. All I could bring back was a song, aptly entitled “There Was Nothing There.”

 There Was Nothing There
Latitude 41 44 53
Longitude 79 13 58
June 2, 1995 Greg Scheer

If you look at a map of world
in the center’s the United States
take a right at Chicago, IL
you’ll run right into Warren, PA
In Warren County the heart of it all
Watson Township the crowning jewel lays
like the big empty ring that it is
it runs circles around lots of space.

There is nothing there.
There is nothing there.
Everywhere you look you’ll find
nothing, ‘cause nothing is there.
If you lo œok to the North,
If you look to the South,
Search the East or West
still there’s nothing there

I just had to see for myself
what mysteries this place could hold
I blazed a path to the depth of the woods.
And when I fixed my sore eyes on my goal

There was nothing there…

But in the end I needed some proof
so I went to develop my film
that would show that this journey was no spoof
but what I found in the camera shocks me still.

There was nothing there…

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