Category: Quirky

Die Alone

If you follow this blog you know I have a tradition of writing depressing birthday songs. And depressing Christmas songs. Come to think of it, I write all sorts of depressing songs.

We’re all going to die alone. Happy birthday!

Since I turned 50 this week, I thought I was due for a big shot of musical existentialism, so I wrote this ode to mortality, “Die Alone.”

One of the things I’ve learned as a songwriter is that a sad song doesn’t necessarily benefit from sad music. Sometimes that just makes it mopey. I decided to break into an upbeat soul groove on this to pull it out of a morass of self-indulgent pity. Serendipitously, as I was working on the recording, I was also at a conference with the inimitable Urban Doxology singers, so I took them out in a back hallway and had them sing the “Hallelujahs” into my laptop. They are joined by the also inimitable Latifah Phillips. Stephen Roach laid down some sweet keys on the a piano in a mostly empty conference room. This was a low tech, high skill affair.

So find a friend, make yourself comfortable, and get ready to Die Alone.

We’re all going to die alone; hallelujah!
Been that way since we were born; hallelujah!
Everyone’s hoping for a home; hallelujah!
Someone they can call their own; hallelujah!

Everybody’s looking for a friend; hallelujah!
But we’re terrified to let them in; hallelujah!
If they knew what’s in your heart and head; hallelujah!
They’d leave you on your own again; hallelujah!

All our lives are spent chasing the wind
But it’s the wind that catches us in the end.
Bones and memories turn to dust.
And another generation only coughs.

Is that enough?

Spend our days wondering what we did; hallelujah!
To deserve all this; hallelujah!
But we’ve spent our years collecting sins; hallelujah!
Maybe that’s why it’s come to this; hallelujah!

We all know that we’re going to die; hallelujah!
We just don’t know how or when; hallelujah!

Quirky

The Strangest Rendition of “One Generation.” Ever.

Post author By Greg Scheer
Post date June 15, 2016
1 Comment on The Strangest Rendition of “One Generation.” Ever.

I don’t want to contribute negatively to anyone’s body image, but this guy has really teeny arms…

FAWM 2016 Quirky Rock and/or Roll

Banana Hook

The other day I was shopping for some kitchen stuff when I came across a banana hook. These things are awesome, because they let you hang your bananas to ripen like they do in their natural habitat, resulting in perfect, evenly ripened bananas.

My enthusiasm soon turned into song.

My first impulse was to make it a lounge lizard song extolling the virtues of various kitchen tools, from the point of view of a guy who thinks it would impress the ladies. But it soon morphed into a joyous surf rock romp. I especially love how the lyrics feel slightly naughty, as if there’s a double entendre. (There’s not.)

I’ve got a banana hook,
and I know how to use it.
Baby, won’t you take a look,
take a look at me?

‘Cause with my banana hook,
and the way I use it,
I ripen my bananas
so evenly.

Quirky

Wendell Kimbrough promo

My friend Wendell Kimbrough asked me to do a promotional video for his Kickstarter campaign. I had a little too much fun with it, as you can see from this YouTube video. I’m pleased to report that his fundraising campaign was successful. (Due, I’m quite certain, to my endorsement…) Now that he has nothing to lose from bad publicity, I thought I’d unveil the first take of my promotional video:

1. When I think of worship, I think of Jesus–
Jesus and Wendell Kimbrough.
Wendell wants to make an album and he needs us;
needs us to help him make this thing go.

Why don’t you donate today?
There are so many ways to pay:
credit card or check,
bitcoin or debit.
Together we will make a way.

2. Jesus doesn’t have an album–thought that would be awesome–
so people have to write their own songs.
Wendell Kimbrough writes songs that are awesome,
and I hear that everybody sings them in heaven. (refrain)

Quirky

I Grew a Beard

The boys had a snow day today, so when this catchy little tune about growing beards popped into my head, I knew I had to enlist them in making a video. Yes, it is ridiculous. Yes, a good time was had by all.

I grew a beard since you’re gone
I grew a beard—it’s been so long
Since you’ve been here
I grew a beard.

I grew a beard missing you
I grew a beard nothing else to do
But drink too much beer
And grow a beard.

I grew a beard…

I grew a beard down my chin
I grew a beard, it’s kind of thin
But I need a friend
So I grew a beard.

I grew a beard just for you
Though I know deep down we’re through
But I’ll be waiting right here
Growing a beard.

I grew a beard…

electronic Quirky

Attention

Here’s what happens on a Friday morning when I’ve been trying to load Kontakt all week long, and I open up a new Logic Pro file to verify my failure, and am then led astray by the ear candy of all the interesting instruments that automatically appear in the “electronic” template: Attention.

Demos Quirky

I’m Down

While I was working on a song for Colin a few days ago, I had an idea for a little ditty: “I’m Down” (MP3). It was more a way for me to work out some jazz harmonies rather than my personal issues. In fact, it was a lovely afternoon, and I was having a little fun playing at being miserable, like Berk Breathed years before me:

And the Beatles and Adrian Belew years before that:

I’m pretty sure I won’t be displacing Breathed, the Beatles, or Belew with my little paean to misery.

Demos Quirky Rock and/or Roll

Happy Anniversary

greg_and_amy_pose — Look at this couple–they were destined to be together!

This year’s anniversary was one of the weirder ones in Amy and my 21 years of marriage. I’ve been on sabbatical in Richmond, VA, working with the Urban Doxology Songwriting Internship and writing a new book, while Amy has stayed home with the boys. Making my wife a single mom for nearly two months makes me about the biggest heel in the history of marriage.

But even though I was 800 miles away, I woke up the morning of my anniversary thinking about Amy and thankful for our marriage. This turned into a little anniversary song by the time I was out of the shower. An hour later I roped the interns into recording it with me. (I knew that KP Purdie’s buttery vocal tones would sell the smooth R&B feel I imagined for the song.) Unfortunately my computer was broken at the time, so I wasn’t able to surprise Amy with it on our actual anniversary. But better late than never.

Happy Anniversary, Amy. You’re a keeper!

Listen to the love: MP3

Quirky

I Feel Sad for Canadians

On this July 4th, it wouldn’t be right to gloat about what a great nation the USA is without feeling a little twinge of sadness for our neighbors to the north. My son Theo put it best when he held up something we had purchased and said wistfully, “I feel sad for Canadians. They always have to pay more for things.” Very true, Theo. Very true.

My fellow Americans, click on this MP3 and take a moment to feel sad for Canadians.

FAWM 2014 Quirky Rock and/or Roll

#14

Post author By Greg Scheer
Post date March 1, 2014
No Comments on #14

I knew I’d never be able to live with myself if I didn’t complete the FAWM challenge. So here I am on the last Friday night of the month finishing up my 14th and final song, appropriately titled “#14.” Also appropriate is the time signature. Now that I have successfully completed my musical mission, I look forward to getting to know my wife and children again. That is, if they haven’t assumed me dead and changed the locks…

While I test the door, you take a listen: MP3.